Amber's Apple Pie

I hate making apple pie. Apple pie is the most work of all pies. Well pies that I've attempted anyway. All the peeling and coring and cooking and blah blah blah. Too much work. Pumpkin pie is more up my alley. I volunteered to bring pumpkin pie to Thanksgiving dinner at my in-laws and didn't want to make JUST pumpkin pie, I need two pies.

Apple pie is Terry's favourite dessert, and he doesn't even like dessert for the most part. When I met Terry he often had an apple pie in his fridge and thought that a piece of apple pie made for a legitimate breakfast. Just to be clear.....Terry didn't ask me to make him apple pie.....because he knows how much I loathe it. But how can I not when I know it's the only dessert he loves?? This apple pie is his anniversary present from me.

This is how I made my apple pie today. I no longer have the luxury of completing a task from start to finish without long breaks in between.

Amber's Apple Pie (adapted from Gesine Bullock-Prado's "Confections of a Closet Master Baker"):

Makes two double crusted pies. Because if you are going to go to all that work to make pie, why not just make two at once.

For crust: 8 cups all-purpose flour 5 cups cold butter (eeep!....no one said pie is good for you) 2 teaspoons salt (only add if you are using unsalted butter, I used salted butter so I omitted the salt) 1/2 teaspoon lemon juice stirred into 1 1/2 cups cold water Place the flour in a large bowl. Cut the butter in to 1-inch pieces. Add to the flour and incorporate with your hands, pinching and massaging the butter into the flour, making sure to leave discernable chunks of butter intact. Chunks of butter are good. Add the water/lemon juice to the flour and butter and mix gently until dough comes together sllightly. Shape the dough into a rough square and let it rest for 10 minutes.
Play trucks and barn animals while you wait.

On a lightly floured surface, roll the dough into 1/2 inch thick rectangle. Give the dough 3 single turns, followed by one double turn. Cover and refrigerate.

Then Lucas and I went for a walk to the park. I have to remind myself that these times of just him and I are going to become fewer and fewer, so I have to take advantage of these last few months just the two of us. I thought I could also walk to Tim Horton's after the park and maybe to the mall to get a few things I needed, but being 8 months pregnant makes you tired apparently so I had to hop in the van and drive the 2 blocks to the mall. Sad.

That was enough for one morning so Lucas and I laid down for a loooooooong afternoon nap, sleeping together in Mom and Dad's bed. He never sleeps in our bed, so this was a special treat. When we got up, I continued my pie.......

For the filling:

17 apples (I used Royal Gala because they were on sale, but Spartan or Granny Smith would also be fine)
Lemon juice (just enough to toss with the apples so they don't brown while you are spending an eternity peeling and coring and slicing)
1 cup packed brown sugar 1 cup granulated sugar
1/2 cup all purpose flour 2 teaspoons cinnamon 1/2 teaspoon nutmeg 1/2 teaspoon cloves 1 teaspoon salt 1/4 cup butter 1 teaspoon vanilla extract 1/2 cup heavy cream

Peel and slice the apples. You actually only need 16 apples for the pies, but another one if you have a little guy like I do that wants to pick up the apples you have peeled and sliced and take a bite out of each one. Sprinkle with lemon juice.

This is probably the part I hate most about making apple pie. It takes forever and it is tedious. So I needed a break after this to cook supper and play with Lucas before I put him to bed. He is SO MUCH FUN right now. I love this age. He still loves his mom and wants me to be with him all the time, and he is talking a mile a minute, pointing out everything he sees.

Combine the sugars, flour, cinnamon, nutmeg, and cloves into a large bowl, add the apples and toss to coat. In a sturdy pot large enough to hold all the apples, melt the butter with the vanilla and cream. Add the apples and cook until the fruit is soft and the mixture thickens, about 20-30 minutes. While the apples are cooking, do the dishes and clean up the kitchen because it is probably a disaster right about now. Pick up toys off the floor and check on your buddy to make sure he is sleeping.

To assemble the pie:

Take your pastry and cut into fourths. You should see layers of dough and butter (I didn't see this, which made me really worried that my pies weren't going to turn out). When you roll, you want to press down on these layers. You don't want to lay the cut side down; make sure the layers are parallel to the rolling table and you are pressing the layers down into each other. Roll each piece into a 1o-inch circle. Transfer the first two circles to pie plates and crimp the edges. Freeze for at least a 1/2 hour. Wrap the other 10-inch rounds in plastic and refrigerate until you are ready to assemble the pie.

When you are ready to bake (and have almost lost your sanity from all of this work, and you don't even have any idea if this is going to turn out or not), preheat the oven to 350. Take the frozen pie shell from the freezer and stab the bottom of the shell with a fork a few times. Line the shell with foil or parchment paper and fill it with pie weights or dry beans or rice (so the bottom doesn't puff up like the rest of the crust). Bake until the edges are slightly golden, and the bottom of the shell no longer looks wet and raw, about 15 minutes. This is so the bottom of your pie won't be soggy.

Beat the egg with 1 tablespoon water to make an egg wash. Remove the foil and the weights/rice/beans and transfer the filling to the shell. Place your second dough circle on top of the filling. Brush the top of the dough with the egg wash and sprinkle with sugar. Bake at 350 until the crust is golden brown and the filling is bubbling.

Stand back and marvel that your pies actually turned out. Vow to only make apple pie once a year to save your sanity. Go pass out in bed after your long day of pie baking.