TWO BABIES

I AM GOING TO BE A MOM OF TWO BABIES. TWO.

Just for clarification that is Lucas + 1. I still haven't quite come to grips with this concept, and probably won't until I am holding baby #2 in my arms.

We have chosen not to find out the sex of the baby this time around, mostly because I don't feel like I need to know. There is no way I could have waited 9 months to find out if Lucas was a boy or a girl but this one seems different. Boy? Awesome, a brother for Lucas super close in age. They will have a blast together and drive their Mom crazy and never fight. Girl? Fabulous, one of each and I finally get to use my girl name. As long as it is a healthy, non-colicky, good sleeper baby. Fingers crossed.

I am finally beginning to be able to drag myself off of the couch in the evenings. Those first three months were rough. I don't remember this phase when I was pregnant with Lucas, but that could be because I could come home and nap on the couch without someone asking me to play trucks or put a sticker on my nose. A little more nauseous that I was with Lucas, but nothing major. I do not enjoy being pregnant, not even a little. And I don't even have anything to complain about!! I have heard of people having awful pregnancies for the whole 9 months, so I feel guilty that I dislike it. I don't like that my clothes don't fit, I don't like feeling tired all the time and I am really not going to like getting huge. I remember that part quite well.

I gained A LOT of weight with my first pregnancy. I am not sure if it was because I broke my ankle pretty early into it and never really exercised, or if I indulged a little too much, or if it was just having a baby in my belly. I resolved that this time would be different, that I would get as much exercise as I can, eat healthy and do what I can to stay within a normal range. A few problems with this;

#1) I didn't realize (or maybe forgot) that after working for 8 hours, I would have no energy left.

#2) Chips. Why can't I crave carrot sticks, or apples, or milk????? Stupid chips. My nemesis. I shared some chips last night with Terry while we watched Glee and felt so guilty after that I couldn't sleep. Chips, we are done. No more. I don't want to see you again, probably ever. Maybe once a month.

I am a little bit ahead of the game this time because I weigh less that I did when I got pregnant with Lucas, but I DO NOT want to be as big as I was last time. Not sure if I have control over that or not but I guess we will see.

I am trying to enjoy all of the Mom and Lucas time I can before this one comes along and steals some of Lucas' thunder. We had a great time together this morning. Well it didn't start out so great I suppose. Lucas was opening drawers in the bathroom while I was brushing my teeth and fell somehow while shutting one of the drawers and sliced his finger. Poor guy, looked like it hurt. We cuddled and watched Finding Nemo to ease the pain, then went on a trip to the park. You would think from listening to Lucas scream while I was attempting to put a band-aid on that
I was trying to cut his finger off. He forgot all about it after a few swings and slides at the park followed by a mini-picnic with Teddy Grahams and a juice box.

I have had so many thoughts in the first three months that I wanted to blog about but couldn't, and now they are all gone.