I have mom insomnia.

I am absolutely exhausted. I have been having nightmares about bad guys and spiders (seriously... last night it was a robot-type spider that wove a very intricate web at the bottom of my closet shaped like a bridge) lately and I have not had a good night's sleep in a while. Also....and this is the case tonight...I go to sleep worrying about Lucas and I can't stop thinking.

It is 12:07 and I am lying in bed mentally going through the rooms of my house and making a mental checklist of all of the babyproofing that we have to do. And then I think I should maybe go check on him again just to make sure he isn't wedged up into a corner of his crib, or he has enough blankets. Even though I have checked on him 3 times since I went upstairs to bed. Is he getting enough sleep? Am I reading him enough stories? Feeding him the right foods? Too much foods / not enough breastfeeding? Not enough food / too much breastfeeding? Does he have enough toys and the right kind? Is he watching too much TV? Should I be playing more music for him and singing to him more? I could go on and on.

It is probably always like this for moms with kids of any age. Worry worry worry. All this stress is making me tired.