Home stretch!

5 more weeks to go, 3 more weeks of work. Hopefully I can do it. I remember last time I pushed myself a bit too far and was so exhausted and sore by the time I was done working. I told myself I wouldn't do it again but here I am. I'm starting to retain some fluid, and the doctor says if it gets any worse I will have to be done sooner.

I had also better be done before I start putting someone's life in danger because I have a serious case of baby brain going on. A few of my follies thus far:

1) While staying at Terry's parents for Thanksgiving, Lucas wet the bed. I threw his sheets and PJ's in the washing machine for a quick wash, along with his wet diaper. Don't do that ever. It leaves little white pieces of disintegrated diaper all over everything.

2) I picked up Lucas from daycare last week and looked back at him in his car seat, only socks on his feet. Forgot his shoes at daycare.

3) My daycare lady told me the other day that Lucas came with his pants on backwards that morning. Who is dressing this kid?!?!?

Also, I drop vials and pens at work almost every 5 minutes. Butterfingers.

Terry's cousin remarked that you would think for safety's sake you would get smarter during pregnancy to protect the baby and all that. No such luck over here.

Amber's Apple Pie

I hate making apple pie. Apple pie is the most work of all pies. Well pies that I've attempted anyway. All the peeling and coring and cooking and blah blah blah. Too much work. Pumpkin pie is more up my alley. I volunteered to bring pumpkin pie to Thanksgiving dinner at my in-laws and didn't want to make JUST pumpkin pie, I need two pies.

Apple pie is Terry's favourite dessert, and he doesn't even like dessert for the most part. When I met Terry he often had an apple pie in his fridge and thought that a piece of apple pie made for a legitimate breakfast. Just to be clear.....Terry didn't ask me to make him apple pie.....because he knows how much I loathe it. But how can I not when I know it's the only dessert he loves?? This apple pie is his anniversary present from me.

This is how I made my apple pie today. I no longer have the luxury of completing a task from start to finish without long breaks in between.

Amber's Apple Pie (adapted from Gesine Bullock-Prado's "Confections of a Closet Master Baker"):

Makes two double crusted pies. Because if you are going to go to all that work to make pie, why not just make two at once.

For crust: 8 cups all-purpose flour 5 cups cold butter (eeep!....no one said pie is good for you) 2 teaspoons salt (only add if you are using unsalted butter, I used salted butter so I omitted the salt) 1/2 teaspoon lemon juice stirred into 1 1/2 cups cold water Place the flour in a large bowl. Cut the butter in to 1-inch pieces. Add to the flour and incorporate with your hands, pinching and massaging the butter into the flour, making sure to leave discernable chunks of butter intact. Chunks of butter are good. Add the water/lemon juice to the flour and butter and mix gently until dough comes together sllightly. Shape the dough into a rough square and let it rest for 10 minutes.
Play trucks and barn animals while you wait.

On a lightly floured surface, roll the dough into 1/2 inch thick rectangle. Give the dough 3 single turns, followed by one double turn. Cover and refrigerate.

Then Lucas and I went for a walk to the park. I have to remind myself that these times of just him and I are going to become fewer and fewer, so I have to take advantage of these last few months just the two of us. I thought I could also walk to Tim Horton's after the park and maybe to the mall to get a few things I needed, but being 8 months pregnant makes you tired apparently so I had to hop in the van and drive the 2 blocks to the mall. Sad.

That was enough for one morning so Lucas and I laid down for a loooooooong afternoon nap, sleeping together in Mom and Dad's bed. He never sleeps in our bed, so this was a special treat. When we got up, I continued my pie.......

For the filling:

17 apples (I used Royal Gala because they were on sale, but Spartan or Granny Smith would also be fine)
Lemon juice (just enough to toss with the apples so they don't brown while you are spending an eternity peeling and coring and slicing)
1 cup packed brown sugar 1 cup granulated sugar
1/2 cup all purpose flour 2 teaspoons cinnamon 1/2 teaspoon nutmeg 1/2 teaspoon cloves 1 teaspoon salt 1/4 cup butter 1 teaspoon vanilla extract 1/2 cup heavy cream

Peel and slice the apples. You actually only need 16 apples for the pies, but another one if you have a little guy like I do that wants to pick up the apples you have peeled and sliced and take a bite out of each one. Sprinkle with lemon juice.

This is probably the part I hate most about making apple pie. It takes forever and it is tedious. So I needed a break after this to cook supper and play with Lucas before I put him to bed. He is SO MUCH FUN right now. I love this age. He still loves his mom and wants me to be with him all the time, and he is talking a mile a minute, pointing out everything he sees.

Combine the sugars, flour, cinnamon, nutmeg, and cloves into a large bowl, add the apples and toss to coat. In a sturdy pot large enough to hold all the apples, melt the butter with the vanilla and cream. Add the apples and cook until the fruit is soft and the mixture thickens, about 20-30 minutes. While the apples are cooking, do the dishes and clean up the kitchen because it is probably a disaster right about now. Pick up toys off the floor and check on your buddy to make sure he is sleeping.

To assemble the pie:

Take your pastry and cut into fourths. You should see layers of dough and butter (I didn't see this, which made me really worried that my pies weren't going to turn out). When you roll, you want to press down on these layers. You don't want to lay the cut side down; make sure the layers are parallel to the rolling table and you are pressing the layers down into each other. Roll each piece into a 1o-inch circle. Transfer the first two circles to pie plates and crimp the edges. Freeze for at least a 1/2 hour. Wrap the other 10-inch rounds in plastic and refrigerate until you are ready to assemble the pie.

When you are ready to bake (and have almost lost your sanity from all of this work, and you don't even have any idea if this is going to turn out or not), preheat the oven to 350. Take the frozen pie shell from the freezer and stab the bottom of the shell with a fork a few times. Line the shell with foil or parchment paper and fill it with pie weights or dry beans or rice (so the bottom doesn't puff up like the rest of the crust). Bake until the edges are slightly golden, and the bottom of the shell no longer looks wet and raw, about 15 minutes. This is so the bottom of your pie won't be soggy.

Beat the egg with 1 tablespoon water to make an egg wash. Remove the foil and the weights/rice/beans and transfer the filling to the shell. Place your second dough circle on top of the filling. Brush the top of the dough with the egg wash and sprinkle with sugar. Bake at 350 until the crust is golden brown and the filling is bubbling.

Stand back and marvel that your pies actually turned out. Vow to only make apple pie once a year to save your sanity. Go pass out in bed after your long day of pie baking.

Financial mastermind

I am getting quite concerned that I will not have enough time to watch all the shows I want to this fall. It is Tuesday of week 1 of new shows, and I am already behind!!!!

My life problems are serious.

Last week I went to an expensive maternity and baby boutique (you Saskatooners can imagine which one...there are not many) and tried on some maternity jeans. I had a gift certificate, which I knew wouldn't cover the cost, but I thought it might put a DENT in it at least.

You guys. These jeans were $300.

THREE HUNDRED DOLLARS.

FOR MATERNITY JEANS.

ONES THAT (hopefully) WON'T FIT YOU IN 6 MONTHS.

Now, there was a time not so long ago when I wouldn't bat an eyelash at spending that kind of money on a pair of jeans. Well maybe I would bat an eyelash, but just one, and then I would charge it to my Visa and forget how much I spent. Problem solved. Did I mention I am still paying off my student loans?

I just can't bring myself to do it anymore. For various reasons I suppose. For one, my husband would probably divorce me. For two, if my mom found out she would remind me that I am "saving" for a new house. So I spent my gift certificate on Sophie the giraffe and a cute sleeper for the new baby instead.

And then I went home and I bought the same jeans on eBay for less than half of what they would have cost. HEY. AT LEAST I AM RESOURCEFUL IN MY OVERSPENDING.

I need more ideas for fall cupcakes. Not pumpkin. Maple of course. What else???

A rainy Lucas and Mom day

We had a great morning today, my buddy and I. Dropped off Dad at work, hit up the Lawson Mall play area, then Sears for some sleepers for the new little one, and then Costco. Lucas put up with me dragging him all over the city in the rain and was a great guy the whole time. I love taking him places, and doing things just him and I. I'm sad that these "Lucas and Mom" days are going to get to be few and far between in the near future, but hopefully that will make them more special.

Lucas' big boy room is all set up and ready to go. Just waiting on him to be excited to sleep in his new bed.......anytime Lucas.....anytime.

I never thought being a mom would change me so much.

Today I signed up to be a potential bone marrow or stem cell donor. If I qualify (all you have to be is healthy!), they will send me a package in the mail to swab my cheek, and then my info goes into a registry awaiting a match. I read an article today in a magazine that talked about all of the different things you can donate to save a life or improve the well-being of someone else. Along with bone marrow and stem cells they talked about donating blood, and donating hair. I thought of Lucas as soon as I put down the magazine. There are kids out there his age that have devastating diseases, and what if all it took to save them was a simple operation or blood transfusion??? What if you could save someone's Mom or Dad just by being a match? Of course I knew there were sick kids before I had kids of my own, but it just doesn't affect you the same way.

If you are interested, visit http://www.onematch.ca/ to get more information.

On my drive to and from work today, I was daydreaming (while paying full attention to the road of course.....) about how work is just a way for me to provide for myself and my family these days. I have never been much of a "career focused" person, and this has become more apparent since Lucas is around. Work is obviously where I spend a lot of my time, but for some reason it just feels like a small part of my life which is becoming less and less significant. I am getting better at not getting worked up about the small annoyances in my day, and to look at the big picture. Which is an accomplishment for me....there are a lot of annoyances as you can imagine!!!!! If I let them all get to me I would have had a serious mental breakdown by now. I think having Lucas has made me a more compassionate person at work and in general.

Popcle?

Lucas has impetigo. It's a contagious skin infection that is only cured with antibiotics. Lucas is horrible at taking antibiotics, and medicine in general. You would think that his Mom the pharmacist would have a magic, painless and cry-free method to give him antibiotics. But there is no such thing. Nothing I have tried yet anyway. He is a smart cookie and can tell when his popsicles/freezies have been tampered with. He's too young to take bribes, and doesn't understand when I say "If you take this you can have a popsicle?" All he hears is "Blah blah blah blah POPSICLE?" And then all I hear is "'Popcle? Popcle? Popcle?

Oh did I mention that he is also getting molars? From the looks/sounds of it those things hurt. Good times over here at the Fusco house. I shouldn't complain about minor illnesses like impetigo and teething. What if he was really sick and had to get needles all the time??? Or (heaven forbid) chemo???? How do those kids do it??? How do their parents do it????

Fall is coming, or autumn if you prefer. Fall means back to school (not for me, wahoooo!!!) and new clothes (not for me.....booooo) and Huskie soccer season, and maple cupcakes and pumpkin cupcakes and cute sweaters and scarves and pretty leaves, and warm coffees, and chili and stew. I heart you, fall.

I am my mother.

Yesterday one of my co-workers asked me how I keep my house in order while working full time. Ha ha ha house in order....how humorous.

For some reason I can only get into 'the zone' to clean my house and get organized at night. Last night I conquered the kitchen at least. I was up late cleaning and going through my pile of papers when I realized: I AM MY MOM.

Growing up, I always remember hearing my mom puttering around in the kitchen late at night. It was comforting knowing she was out there, still awake, keeping all the monsters and bad guys at bay. I guess we are both night owls. Sometimes I will get an email from her and the time reads something ridiculous like 2 am. My guess is that she is up late worrying about her kids. Do the worries just compound on each other with the more kids you have??

My mom and I share a hobby of collecting recipes and never actually making them. Hers are nicely organized in binders and photo albums in her kitchen, mine are websites bookmarked in my internet browser. She promised me that I could have all of her recipes when she dies. Goody.

I can only hope that someday my house will be in showroom condition at all times like my Mom's and I will be able to pull off cooking dinner for 20 without even blinking an eye.

Not a Millionaire Yet

Unfortunately I didn't win the LottoMax jackpot on Friday night so I had to work as planned this weekend.

I despise working weekends.

I never thought about this when I applied to get in to pharmacy. I mean I KNEW that pharmacies are open on weekends and past 5 pm, but I shrugged it off as no big deal. And the hours at my job are pretty good compared to a lot of other pharmacies, which is I guess one of the reasons I am there. Now that I have Lucas (and probably because it's summertime!) it seems like such a waste of valuable time being at work while my family is at home without me.

There have been a lot of changes at my job since I have come back from being on maternity leave with Lucas, and I am struggling to think of something positive that has come as a result. I have learned a lot about myself and what kind of work environment I enjoy this year, and what I need to be happy and fulfilled in my job. There you go, something positive to take from this year, that this has been a learning experience for me. I would feel a lot better about leaving my family at home if I was going to work feeling like I am advancing myself in some way or making a difference for our patients. I used to feel like this at work for the most part, and now that feeling is just gone. My general demeanor at my job has changed, and I feel like I am not providing the best care for our patients as a result. I am really bothered by the fact that I haven't been able to rise above all of these changes and challenges, and just do my job in the same manner that I was able to do before. At least going on maternity leave for baby #2, I can take consolation in the fact that when I go back to work, everything will have changed again, hopefully for the better this time.

Lucas missed his mom this weekend. After work yesterday I had made plans to have dinner with one of my very best friends who I haven't seen in a long time. We needed a good catch-up and it is so hard to squeeze it in with both of us being so busy. When I left the house last night, Lucas was at the screen door, crying his little heart out. I could just imagine what he was thinking. "Mom you have been gone all weekend and now you are leaving again?!?!? But I miss you and I just want to cuddle and play, why do you have to go again???" His sad little face looking out the door just broke my heart.

I told my Mom what happened on the phone when I got home from dinner, and she said that she was on Lucas' side. Huge surprise Mom!!! I am on Lucas' side too. He can blame any emotional problems he suffers in life on his mom leaving him crying at the screen door when he was little.

Too hot to bake

Notice how I haven't made any cupcakes lately? Or anything in the oven for that matter.....

OK I admit I was a little burnt out from making almost 200 mini cupcakes for my cousin's wedding. Not that I regret making them AT ALL, just that can you blame me for not wanting to see another cupcake for a little while?

I feel GUILTY that I have been neglecting my new hobby, and that I haven't tried anything new or exciting lately. My list of new ones I want to try: Cinnamon Toast, Lemon Drop and Chai Tea. Mmmmmmm. Not sure when I am going to get around to doing those, this baby in my belly seems to be taking a lot of my energy, and the one that is up and running around seems to be taking a lot of my time. He's not much of a baby anymore I suppose. Sniff, sniff.....tear, tear....

I have been reading a lot of recipe blogs and websites lately and I want to make everything. I feel like Terry and I cook the same 25 things for supper all the time and I need some new tried and true recipes to add to our rotation. Suggestions welcome!!!

Some of these baking/cooking blogs I have been reading are absolutely amazing. They must blog for a living, because seriously when does a normal person have time to not only bake something amazing once a week, but take pictures of the process and write about it in an interesting way. See my blog list on the side for the ones I subscribe to.

Not only do I want to try new recipes, but I want to have an ARSENAL of amazing baking recipes at my disposal. I don't just want to make blueberry muffins, I want them to be THE BEST *&#*$ BLUEBERRY MUFFINS YOU HAVE EVER TASTED. You can't just search "best blueberry muffins ever" as often the recipes with "best" in the title turn out to be not even "kind of good blueberry muffins". I think the only way to do this is try a zillion recipes until you find one that is awesome. I don't have time for this.

Working is for chumps. I am quitting my job to make amazing things in my kitchen all day. I'm sure Terry won't mind taking on another 3 jobs to pay the mortgage.

Seattle

It's 9 pm and Lucas juuuuuuust fell asleep, after about an hour of me trying to put him to bed. He is still getting back into his routine after our trip to Seattle.

Normally at about 8 pm we read a few stories while he has his milk, I give him a kiss and put him in his crib and say "Goodnight Lucas" and he says "Bye" and then goes to sleep. How wonderful. Of course this routine just didn't magically happen, we had to work at it, but 4 nights away from home has put us back a few steps. So a bit of cuddling in Mom's bed and a few cartoons to get him to sit still and calm down isn't the end of the world.....I guess. Besides, he was such a little trooper during our trip that he deserves a bit of leeway.

I knew traveling with an 19-month old was going to be different than any of the trips Terry and I have taken together before, and I think it went really well. There were definitely some challenges, but all in all Lucas was a great little traveler and I think we came pretty well prepared.

We brought our massive Tonka-truck of a stroller, and even though it is huge and bulky (the Air Canada customer service agents were probably swearing at us under their breath trying to wrap that thing in plastic, which would explain why it came back looking a little worse for wear after our return flight....) it was a necessity and it would have made for a tough trip with just a little umbrella stroller. We have a Quinny Freestyle, probably the one baby thing that we splurged on when Lucas was coming, and already it has been a worthwhile investment. Every morning we would load it up with what we needed for the day and head on out. Lucas would fall asleep in there for his afternoon nap, I could recline him and throw a blanket over top, and voila, afternoon nap without having to go back to the hotel, and two hours of sleep time.

Seattle is a nice city, but not what I expected really. The waterfront is so industrial and just....well not pretty like Vancouver. There is no green space at all downtown. The only time Lucas got to run around in a park was our trip to the zoo. The Pike Place market was amazing. Everything is so fresh. The fruit and fresh fish were delicious! The kids play area at the downtown library, the zoo and the aquarium were Lucas' faves for sure, and great places for kids, but next time I would skip the Children's Museum. I think the highlights for Terry were taking almost every mode of transportation possible. The monorail, the streetcar, the city bus.....super exciting Terry.

For me, I just loved seeing Lucas have a great time. He loved loved loved all the animals at the zoo and the fish at the aquarium. I think he would have jumped right into the starfish tank if we would have let him. He learned a few new words while we were there (notably elevator....which sounds more like eeevvaaaooorrrr? when he says it) and developed a love for buses. Seeing Amy play soccer was also one of my favourite parts, I haven't seen her play in what seems like forever and she had a great game. It is so crazy that we planned this trip not knowing that she had a game in Seattle at the very same time. Couldn't have worked out better.

Of course I did just a little shopping while I was there, but being pregnant helped keep me under control. What is the point of buying clothes that aren't going to fit me in a month anyway??? So instead I took advantage of some maternity stores that we don't have and scored some great deals at Gap Maternity. Pea in a Pod on the other hand was not a great deal, that stuff is crazy expensive!!!! But I got a few lower priced items that will last me through the summer. Maybe this time my pregnancy wardrobe will consist of more than my pink bunnyhug and Lulu pants.

We stayed at the Grand Hyatt Seattle and it was fantastic. I used priceline.com to bid on a hotel room, which I have done once before, and it worked out great again. We got a downtown hotel room for $100 bucks a night, which was about 60 % off of the normal price. I highly recommend it and would do it again in a second. You don't get to pick your exact hotel that you want, you just pick the area and the number of stars for your hotel, and then enter what you are willing to pay.

Air Canada, not so fantastic. This trip was on a tight budget, so we used Air Miles and didn't get to pick our airline. Their planes are old and noisy, and everything was just sub-par compared to West Jet. No TV's to watch World Cup games. Boooooo.

I didn't win the $50 million Lottomax jackpot so I guess it is back to work on Monday.....sigh.

Mee-mo?

I just want to stay home and watch the World Cup all day. I don't feel like I am having a good World Cup "experience" since all of the games are on while I'm at work. I can't wait to know the scores of the games, so when they are replayed later I already know what happened and it's just not the same. Another reason to become a wealthy socialite. I am sure socialites get to stay at home and watch soccer all day. Paris Hilton is probably having a great World Cup experience.

Dudes I am still pregnant. I think Terry is getting quite sick of me saying "Terry you are going to be a Dad of TWO. TWO BABIES" or "Terry there's a baby in my belly". He said to me that he thought I would be less amazed that I am getting a belly and how fast my body changes the second time around. Nope. I forgot. Still don't quite believe it, even though we went for an ultrasound and I have a picture to prove it.

Stop reading now if you are squeamish OR if you are my mom. Ha ha ha....just kidding mom.

Along with a growing belly I also have HUGE BOOBS. Thanks for nothing hormones. Seriously how come they just explode all of a sudden? I had a bra fitting last week because I was busting out of my clothes and I went from a B cup (which I was super happy about, juuuuuuuuuuust right) to a DOUBLE D. The lady said I was borderline triple.......whaaaaaaaaaaat? So dumb.

Lucas is learning words like mad. Copies almost everything we say. I was talking to my mom on the phone and Lucas was pulling random sharp objects out of my cupboards. I said to my mom that Lucas was being a little bugger and immediately "bug-ger????" out of Lucas' mouth. Don't learn that one buddy. Work on please and thank you instead.

Da-do da-do da-do (Lucaspeak for thank you)
Peaz? (Lucaspeak for please)

I am starting to get a little worried about Lucas' Finding Nemo addiction. I needed to get something done (like shower I think) one day and there were no episodes of Sesame Street left to watch, so I found one of the only kids movies I own and popped it in. How was I to know I was creating a monster??? EVERY TIME we go downstairs now, all I hear is "Meee-mo? Mee-mo? Mee-mo?". If I don't put it in, he then goes and finds the DVD, takes it out and tries to jam it in to the DVD player.