Popcle?

Lucas has impetigo. It's a contagious skin infection that is only cured with antibiotics. Lucas is horrible at taking antibiotics, and medicine in general. You would think that his Mom the pharmacist would have a magic, painless and cry-free method to give him antibiotics. But there is no such thing. Nothing I have tried yet anyway. He is a smart cookie and can tell when his popsicles/freezies have been tampered with. He's too young to take bribes, and doesn't understand when I say "If you take this you can have a popsicle?" All he hears is "Blah blah blah blah POPSICLE?" And then all I hear is "'Popcle? Popcle? Popcle?

Oh did I mention that he is also getting molars? From the looks/sounds of it those things hurt. Good times over here at the Fusco house. I shouldn't complain about minor illnesses like impetigo and teething. What if he was really sick and had to get needles all the time??? Or (heaven forbid) chemo???? How do those kids do it??? How do their parents do it????

Fall is coming, or autumn if you prefer. Fall means back to school (not for me, wahoooo!!!) and new clothes (not for me.....booooo) and Huskie soccer season, and maple cupcakes and pumpkin cupcakes and cute sweaters and scarves and pretty leaves, and warm coffees, and chili and stew. I heart you, fall.

I am my mother.

Yesterday one of my co-workers asked me how I keep my house in order while working full time. Ha ha ha house in order....how humorous.

For some reason I can only get into 'the zone' to clean my house and get organized at night. Last night I conquered the kitchen at least. I was up late cleaning and going through my pile of papers when I realized: I AM MY MOM.

Growing up, I always remember hearing my mom puttering around in the kitchen late at night. It was comforting knowing she was out there, still awake, keeping all the monsters and bad guys at bay. I guess we are both night owls. Sometimes I will get an email from her and the time reads something ridiculous like 2 am. My guess is that she is up late worrying about her kids. Do the worries just compound on each other with the more kids you have??

My mom and I share a hobby of collecting recipes and never actually making them. Hers are nicely organized in binders and photo albums in her kitchen, mine are websites bookmarked in my internet browser. She promised me that I could have all of her recipes when she dies. Goody.

I can only hope that someday my house will be in showroom condition at all times like my Mom's and I will be able to pull off cooking dinner for 20 without even blinking an eye.

Not a Millionaire Yet

Unfortunately I didn't win the LottoMax jackpot on Friday night so I had to work as planned this weekend.

I despise working weekends.

I never thought about this when I applied to get in to pharmacy. I mean I KNEW that pharmacies are open on weekends and past 5 pm, but I shrugged it off as no big deal. And the hours at my job are pretty good compared to a lot of other pharmacies, which is I guess one of the reasons I am there. Now that I have Lucas (and probably because it's summertime!) it seems like such a waste of valuable time being at work while my family is at home without me.

There have been a lot of changes at my job since I have come back from being on maternity leave with Lucas, and I am struggling to think of something positive that has come as a result. I have learned a lot about myself and what kind of work environment I enjoy this year, and what I need to be happy and fulfilled in my job. There you go, something positive to take from this year, that this has been a learning experience for me. I would feel a lot better about leaving my family at home if I was going to work feeling like I am advancing myself in some way or making a difference for our patients. I used to feel like this at work for the most part, and now that feeling is just gone. My general demeanor at my job has changed, and I feel like I am not providing the best care for our patients as a result. I am really bothered by the fact that I haven't been able to rise above all of these changes and challenges, and just do my job in the same manner that I was able to do before. At least going on maternity leave for baby #2, I can take consolation in the fact that when I go back to work, everything will have changed again, hopefully for the better this time.

Lucas missed his mom this weekend. After work yesterday I had made plans to have dinner with one of my very best friends who I haven't seen in a long time. We needed a good catch-up and it is so hard to squeeze it in with both of us being so busy. When I left the house last night, Lucas was at the screen door, crying his little heart out. I could just imagine what he was thinking. "Mom you have been gone all weekend and now you are leaving again?!?!? But I miss you and I just want to cuddle and play, why do you have to go again???" His sad little face looking out the door just broke my heart.

I told my Mom what happened on the phone when I got home from dinner, and she said that she was on Lucas' side. Huge surprise Mom!!! I am on Lucas' side too. He can blame any emotional problems he suffers in life on his mom leaving him crying at the screen door when he was little.

Too hot to bake

Notice how I haven't made any cupcakes lately? Or anything in the oven for that matter.....

OK I admit I was a little burnt out from making almost 200 mini cupcakes for my cousin's wedding. Not that I regret making them AT ALL, just that can you blame me for not wanting to see another cupcake for a little while?

I feel GUILTY that I have been neglecting my new hobby, and that I haven't tried anything new or exciting lately. My list of new ones I want to try: Cinnamon Toast, Lemon Drop and Chai Tea. Mmmmmmm. Not sure when I am going to get around to doing those, this baby in my belly seems to be taking a lot of my energy, and the one that is up and running around seems to be taking a lot of my time. He's not much of a baby anymore I suppose. Sniff, sniff.....tear, tear....

I have been reading a lot of recipe blogs and websites lately and I want to make everything. I feel like Terry and I cook the same 25 things for supper all the time and I need some new tried and true recipes to add to our rotation. Suggestions welcome!!!

Some of these baking/cooking blogs I have been reading are absolutely amazing. They must blog for a living, because seriously when does a normal person have time to not only bake something amazing once a week, but take pictures of the process and write about it in an interesting way. See my blog list on the side for the ones I subscribe to.

Not only do I want to try new recipes, but I want to have an ARSENAL of amazing baking recipes at my disposal. I don't just want to make blueberry muffins, I want them to be THE BEST *&#*$ BLUEBERRY MUFFINS YOU HAVE EVER TASTED. You can't just search "best blueberry muffins ever" as often the recipes with "best" in the title turn out to be not even "kind of good blueberry muffins". I think the only way to do this is try a zillion recipes until you find one that is awesome. I don't have time for this.

Working is for chumps. I am quitting my job to make amazing things in my kitchen all day. I'm sure Terry won't mind taking on another 3 jobs to pay the mortgage.

Seattle

It's 9 pm and Lucas juuuuuuust fell asleep, after about an hour of me trying to put him to bed. He is still getting back into his routine after our trip to Seattle.

Normally at about 8 pm we read a few stories while he has his milk, I give him a kiss and put him in his crib and say "Goodnight Lucas" and he says "Bye" and then goes to sleep. How wonderful. Of course this routine just didn't magically happen, we had to work at it, but 4 nights away from home has put us back a few steps. So a bit of cuddling in Mom's bed and a few cartoons to get him to sit still and calm down isn't the end of the world.....I guess. Besides, he was such a little trooper during our trip that he deserves a bit of leeway.

I knew traveling with an 19-month old was going to be different than any of the trips Terry and I have taken together before, and I think it went really well. There were definitely some challenges, but all in all Lucas was a great little traveler and I think we came pretty well prepared.

We brought our massive Tonka-truck of a stroller, and even though it is huge and bulky (the Air Canada customer service agents were probably swearing at us under their breath trying to wrap that thing in plastic, which would explain why it came back looking a little worse for wear after our return flight....) it was a necessity and it would have made for a tough trip with just a little umbrella stroller. We have a Quinny Freestyle, probably the one baby thing that we splurged on when Lucas was coming, and already it has been a worthwhile investment. Every morning we would load it up with what we needed for the day and head on out. Lucas would fall asleep in there for his afternoon nap, I could recline him and throw a blanket over top, and voila, afternoon nap without having to go back to the hotel, and two hours of sleep time.

Seattle is a nice city, but not what I expected really. The waterfront is so industrial and just....well not pretty like Vancouver. There is no green space at all downtown. The only time Lucas got to run around in a park was our trip to the zoo. The Pike Place market was amazing. Everything is so fresh. The fruit and fresh fish were delicious! The kids play area at the downtown library, the zoo and the aquarium were Lucas' faves for sure, and great places for kids, but next time I would skip the Children's Museum. I think the highlights for Terry were taking almost every mode of transportation possible. The monorail, the streetcar, the city bus.....super exciting Terry.

For me, I just loved seeing Lucas have a great time. He loved loved loved all the animals at the zoo and the fish at the aquarium. I think he would have jumped right into the starfish tank if we would have let him. He learned a few new words while we were there (notably elevator....which sounds more like eeevvaaaooorrrr? when he says it) and developed a love for buses. Seeing Amy play soccer was also one of my favourite parts, I haven't seen her play in what seems like forever and she had a great game. It is so crazy that we planned this trip not knowing that she had a game in Seattle at the very same time. Couldn't have worked out better.

Of course I did just a little shopping while I was there, but being pregnant helped keep me under control. What is the point of buying clothes that aren't going to fit me in a month anyway??? So instead I took advantage of some maternity stores that we don't have and scored some great deals at Gap Maternity. Pea in a Pod on the other hand was not a great deal, that stuff is crazy expensive!!!! But I got a few lower priced items that will last me through the summer. Maybe this time my pregnancy wardrobe will consist of more than my pink bunnyhug and Lulu pants.

We stayed at the Grand Hyatt Seattle and it was fantastic. I used priceline.com to bid on a hotel room, which I have done once before, and it worked out great again. We got a downtown hotel room for $100 bucks a night, which was about 60 % off of the normal price. I highly recommend it and would do it again in a second. You don't get to pick your exact hotel that you want, you just pick the area and the number of stars for your hotel, and then enter what you are willing to pay.

Air Canada, not so fantastic. This trip was on a tight budget, so we used Air Miles and didn't get to pick our airline. Their planes are old and noisy, and everything was just sub-par compared to West Jet. No TV's to watch World Cup games. Boooooo.

I didn't win the $50 million Lottomax jackpot so I guess it is back to work on Monday.....sigh.

Mee-mo?

I just want to stay home and watch the World Cup all day. I don't feel like I am having a good World Cup "experience" since all of the games are on while I'm at work. I can't wait to know the scores of the games, so when they are replayed later I already know what happened and it's just not the same. Another reason to become a wealthy socialite. I am sure socialites get to stay at home and watch soccer all day. Paris Hilton is probably having a great World Cup experience.

Dudes I am still pregnant. I think Terry is getting quite sick of me saying "Terry you are going to be a Dad of TWO. TWO BABIES" or "Terry there's a baby in my belly". He said to me that he thought I would be less amazed that I am getting a belly and how fast my body changes the second time around. Nope. I forgot. Still don't quite believe it, even though we went for an ultrasound and I have a picture to prove it.

Stop reading now if you are squeamish OR if you are my mom. Ha ha ha....just kidding mom.

Along with a growing belly I also have HUGE BOOBS. Thanks for nothing hormones. Seriously how come they just explode all of a sudden? I had a bra fitting last week because I was busting out of my clothes and I went from a B cup (which I was super happy about, juuuuuuuuuuust right) to a DOUBLE D. The lady said I was borderline triple.......whaaaaaaaaaaat? So dumb.

Lucas is learning words like mad. Copies almost everything we say. I was talking to my mom on the phone and Lucas was pulling random sharp objects out of my cupboards. I said to my mom that Lucas was being a little bugger and immediately "bug-ger????" out of Lucas' mouth. Don't learn that one buddy. Work on please and thank you instead.

Da-do da-do da-do (Lucaspeak for thank you)
Peaz? (Lucaspeak for please)

I am starting to get a little worried about Lucas' Finding Nemo addiction. I needed to get something done (like shower I think) one day and there were no episodes of Sesame Street left to watch, so I found one of the only kids movies I own and popped it in. How was I to know I was creating a monster??? EVERY TIME we go downstairs now, all I hear is "Meee-mo? Mee-mo? Mee-mo?". If I don't put it in, he then goes and finds the DVD, takes it out and tries to jam it in to the DVD player.

TWO BABIES

I AM GOING TO BE A MOM OF TWO BABIES. TWO.

Just for clarification that is Lucas + 1. I still haven't quite come to grips with this concept, and probably won't until I am holding baby #2 in my arms.

We have chosen not to find out the sex of the baby this time around, mostly because I don't feel like I need to know. There is no way I could have waited 9 months to find out if Lucas was a boy or a girl but this one seems different. Boy? Awesome, a brother for Lucas super close in age. They will have a blast together and drive their Mom crazy and never fight. Girl? Fabulous, one of each and I finally get to use my girl name. As long as it is a healthy, non-colicky, good sleeper baby. Fingers crossed.

I am finally beginning to be able to drag myself off of the couch in the evenings. Those first three months were rough. I don't remember this phase when I was pregnant with Lucas, but that could be because I could come home and nap on the couch without someone asking me to play trucks or put a sticker on my nose. A little more nauseous that I was with Lucas, but nothing major. I do not enjoy being pregnant, not even a little. And I don't even have anything to complain about!! I have heard of people having awful pregnancies for the whole 9 months, so I feel guilty that I dislike it. I don't like that my clothes don't fit, I don't like feeling tired all the time and I am really not going to like getting huge. I remember that part quite well.

I gained A LOT of weight with my first pregnancy. I am not sure if it was because I broke my ankle pretty early into it and never really exercised, or if I indulged a little too much, or if it was just having a baby in my belly. I resolved that this time would be different, that I would get as much exercise as I can, eat healthy and do what I can to stay within a normal range. A few problems with this;

#1) I didn't realize (or maybe forgot) that after working for 8 hours, I would have no energy left.

#2) Chips. Why can't I crave carrot sticks, or apples, or milk????? Stupid chips. My nemesis. I shared some chips last night with Terry while we watched Glee and felt so guilty after that I couldn't sleep. Chips, we are done. No more. I don't want to see you again, probably ever. Maybe once a month.

I am a little bit ahead of the game this time because I weigh less that I did when I got pregnant with Lucas, but I DO NOT want to be as big as I was last time. Not sure if I have control over that or not but I guess we will see.

I am trying to enjoy all of the Mom and Lucas time I can before this one comes along and steals some of Lucas' thunder. We had a great time together this morning. Well it didn't start out so great I suppose. Lucas was opening drawers in the bathroom while I was brushing my teeth and fell somehow while shutting one of the drawers and sliced his finger. Poor guy, looked like it hurt. We cuddled and watched Finding Nemo to ease the pain, then went on a trip to the park. You would think from listening to Lucas scream while I was attempting to put a band-aid on that
I was trying to cut his finger off. He forgot all about it after a few swings and slides at the park followed by a mini-picnic with Teddy Grahams and a juice box.

I have had so many thoughts in the first three months that I wanted to blog about but couldn't, and now they are all gone.

This and that.

I am "wasting" away my free afternoon at home without Lucas on the computer. I don't know where all my time has gone lately....well that's a lie I do know....work and soccer. But you can sure tell that I haven't been home much from the state of my house. Got that situation partly remedied yesterday and today. I need a laundry fairy and housekeeper. Probably not in the budget, just a guess. Know any that will work for free??

Lately it seems like I have hardly been spending any time with Lucas, so it was nice to have a day off in the middle of the week for "Lucas and Mom day". Swimming, naps, snacks, playing. After spending almost an entire day giving him my undivided attention, I felt a little less guilty about dropping him off yesterday morning before work so I could vacuum and do a few other errands that have been nagging at me from my to do list for weeks.

I wish there were more "Lucas and Mom" days but there just aren't. I'm sure he wouldn't grow up to be very well-adjusted if I gave in to his every whim and gave him all of his mom all the time, but right now I am not getting to see him as much as I like and it just plain sucks.

Having a full time job and being able to help support your family is a privilege, one that I try not to take for granted no matter how much I don't like going some days. I enjoy being able to feel valued at my job and use what I went to school for, and also have some adult conversation. However, by working full time I am sacrificing some precious time with Lucas, one of the many compromises you have to make as a working mom. Daycare is great for him, he loves it there, and is interacting with the other kids really well. At least that is what I tell myself when I drop him off. I just feel like the balance is a bit off, and if I had the option to work 3ish days a week, I think that would be perfect. Not an option right now.

I was complaining at work that I have barely seen Lucas lately, right after our soccer team had indoor provincials all weekend (which we WON!!! - Yeaaaaaaaaaaaahhh!). A co-worker suggested to me that soon I will probably have to quit soccer so that there is time for Lucas to play soccer (or whatever else he wants to....just know Lucas there is no pressure...none at all....but if you don't play soccer you will never know ice cream or cheese again....no big deal). WHAT!?!? Quit soccer??? I have never heard a more absurd idea in my life. Honestly this did not occur to me until that moment that she is somewhat right. But sacrificing something that lets me exercise and hang out with my friends at the same time will not come easy. Hopefully not at all. Terry was sidelined from the soccer field this indoor season due to an injury, and told me the other night that surprisingly he really hasn't missed it. I am not at that point yet, and I honestly hope that I never am.


I just finished a book that my brother gave me for my birthday, called "Northern Light" set in the 1900's I believe, about a teenage girl living on a farm who's mother passed away. She was left with caring for her 3 sisters and her father, while also pursuing her high school diploma. Mattie is a very talented writer and is torn between the obligation to stay at home and care for her family, or continue with her education. So many things in the book made me grateful for the life I have. The opportunity to be BOTH a mom and work. Being able to attend school, and get a post-secondary education. The simple fact that when Lucas has a fever I give him Tylenol and take him to the doctor down the street for antibiotics. It used to be COMMON for people to die of a simple infection. People still do, I just don't see it here in my privileged place.

Vancouver 2010

Terry and I just returned from a whirlwind journey to Vancouver to take in some Olympic festivities. Good thing we scheduled this holiday because I was about to reach my breaking point in the weeks before we left. I don't know how you moms of 2,3 and more do it!! I was exhausted, run down and just all out done with work and life.

There was one night before I left in particular that I can remember falling asleep on the couch right after I put Lucas to bed when I was supposed to be washing my work clothes so I would have something to wear the next day. Needless to say, that did not get done so I was SCRAMBLING the next morning trying to wash my clothes and get Lucas and myself ready and out the door. The nap the night before was not worth all of the stress it caused the following morning and I will not be doing that again. Let's just say I had to drive Lucas to daycare in my dress coat and pyjama pants, then stop at Tim Hortons and return home to take my pants out of the dryer before I went to work. So much coordinating that it hurt my brain. But on my way to work (on time!) I felt like Superwoman because I got everything done. So moms of 2 and 3 and more, you must feel like Superwoman every time you leave the house with kids in tow and arrive at your destination on time!! I salute you.

Back to our much needed vacation. It was tough to leave Lucas with Grandma and Grandpa Vermeulen for four whole days, but everyone survived. Lucas had a great time with his Grandpa and Grandma (I'm sure he was spoiled rotten for the entire four days....I even have evidence...pictures of him dipping his FRIES into ketchup at MCDONALDS). Grandma and Grandpa had a great time too, but they said Lucas is a busy guy and kept them on their toes. How did they ever do it with FOUR kids???? My mom said she was much younger then. I can't even fathom having a six year old, two four year olds and a newborn.

I am not going to go through everything Terry and I did when we were in Vancouver. I'll sum it up with a few bullet points:

1. We walked.....and walked and walked and walked. All over downtown, many many times. The only way to see everything. The cauldron, Inukshuk, Robson Square, The Bay Olympic Superstore, etc, etc.

2. THE HOCKEY GAME - CANADA VS RUSSIA. An amazing sporting event that we will never forget. I will never get to see a game of that magnitude again and we knew that and made the most of it.

3. Beers at pubs with Amy and friends. The Canada vs USA game we were unfortunately watching the game in it's entirety from OUTSIDE the pub while Amy and friends were inside. Guess that's what happens when you arrive at game time.

4. Staying at Casa Tina. Thanks so much Tina for putting us up!!

5. Shopping!! Fave purchase: Mukluks!! Went on a trek all over Van to find ones I liked that didn't cost an arm and a leg.....just an arm. Even got a "nice mukluks" from an aboriginal gentleman on the bus ride home from downtown. Thanks dude.

6. Visited a few cupcake shops for inspiration. Thank you Big City Cupcakes.

It was a fantastic trip and in our opinion Vancouver did a great job hosting. Transit was easy, police were visible everywhere so we felt very safe, and everything was very clean despite the throngs of people passing through downtown everyday.

THANKS VANCOUVER!!! See you again soon!

Trouble!

Lucas is getting older. Newsflash I know. But this means he is more adept at getting into things, mostly getting into trouble.

I tried to get myself ready for my afternoon shift this morning and never again will I try to shower while keeping Lucas entertained at the same time. He rips open the shower curtain, and then gets himself and the bathroom floor soaking wet. When he gets bored of that, he then takes his wet hands and plays with the toilet paper roll, getting wet TP all over his hands. The water must make it look appetizing, because at this point he tries to eat it.

After my very interrupted shower I had the brilliant idea of putting Lucas in the bathtub while I dry my hair and what-not because usually he can keep himself occupied in there for at least 10 minutes. I found out that Lucas' new favorite drink is bathwater. He sticks his face in the water and sluuuuuuuuuuuurps some into his mouth, chokes on it, and then smiles at me like "That was funny!". I tell him "No Lucas, yucky!" so then he tries to do it when I'm not looking. Good try Lucas, I see you and then I hear you choke. Gross.